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The Great Cover-Up

Bateman Hills is a sunny town with a thriving lumber and mayo industry, attractive beaches, and gorgeous forests. However, all of this sleepy charm disguises a dark secret.

There are many murderous stories that never hit the front pages of the Bateman Hills Observer, but live as whispers among the town's inhabitants. Far more than local legends, these occurrences are the work of Mayor Bateman. The town takes its name from his lumberjack ancestor, and Mayor Bateman will stop at nothing to ensure that his community’s reputation remains pristine.

However, sins do no stay buried, and the mound of murdered and forgotten bodies has grown too large. These wronged souls have returned from the grave to bring the truth behind their deaths to life.

Desperate to keep his wicked deeds a secret, the Mayor makes a deal with the deceased: defeat his champions in the log jamming tournament, and not only can they reveal his actions to the world, but he will surrender his beloved town to them. But if they lose, these vengeful spirits must serve as exhibits in a new haunted hotel tourist attraction, further adding to Bateman Hills’s appeal. With a chance to reveal the truth in the balance, the undead agree.

Let's Jam.

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catch this !

Find some flannel and pack your adrenaline for this action-packed, horror sports tragedy. The stakes are high, and the multi-species cheerleaders are jumping higher.

grind your axe on these

Blade Tossing, axe-catching carnage

Choose a timber beast with a level of speed, technique, and swoleness that suits your play style

Funky arenas like a mayonnaise factory spill, 80s hell, and a peaceful beaver pond

Colorful characters, like Bruiser Bogardus, the strong man who makes exercise equipment out of wood, or the Mayonnaise Monsoon, a bloated corpse who died in an industrial accident

A physical cartridge NES version for hardcore fans and retro enthusiasts!

system specs

Storage 320MB

RAM - 512MB

GPU - 2 GB VRAM

CPU - 2.6 GHZ

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lumberjacks, surfers, and mayo, oh my

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a tour of bateman hills and beyond

During the Bateman Hills Heritage Days Lumberjack Log Jamming Tournament, the whole town and the surrounding area are dedicated to feats of lumberjack action. With this year’s slew of spectral entrants, the variety in locales has expanded into all manner of otherworldly offerings!